creative writing school
Module 5: Pleasure & Desire
Welcome to our online creative writing course on the theme of "Letting Go: Embracing loss with joy and positivity." In this course, we will explore the concept of letting go through the lens of loss, challenging traditional notions of mourning and lamentation. While European heritage often associates loss with darkness, sadness, and tears, we will seek to discover alternative perspectives that embrace loss as an opportunity for growth, transformation, and even celebration. Throughout this course, we will delve into diverse cultural practices, rituals, and storytelling traditions that offer uplifting and positive ways to navigate the experience of letting go. Join us as we embark on a journey of creativity, resilience, and hope, discovering the power of joy amidst loss.
theory
In psychology, separation and differentiation refer to processes individuals undergo in their development and relationships. Separation involves the psychological and emotional distancing from others, particularly from primary caregivers, to establish a sense of independence and autonomy. Differentiation, on the other hand, entails the ability to maintain one's own identity and autonomy while simultaneously remaining emotionally connected to others.
These concepts are closely linked to the topic of loss and letting go, as they involve navigating the emotional terrain of detachment and connection. When faced with loss, individuals often experience a sense of separation from the person or thing they have lost. This can be accompanied by feelings of grief, sadness, and longing as they adjust to the absence of what was once familiar and significant.
At the same time, the process of differentiation becomes crucial in coping with loss. It enables individuals to maintain a sense of self amidst the pain of separation, allowing them to acknowledge their feelings while also preserving their own identity and autonomy. By fostering a healthy sense of differentiation, individuals can navigate the grieving process more effectively and ultimately find a path toward acceptance and healing.
There are cultures that perceive loss as a celebration or view it through a more positive lens. In some societies, rituals surrounding separation and loss are designed to facilitate healing, closure, and even transformation. Here are a few examples of such rituals from different cultures:
1. Dia de los Muertos (Day of the Dead) - Celebrated primarily in Mexico, this holiday honors deceased loved ones by creating altars with their photos, favorite foods, and other offerings. Families gather to remember and celebrate the lives of the departed through music, dance, and storytelling.
2. Bon Festival - Observed in Japan, the Bon Festival is a Buddhist tradition where families honor the spirits of their ancestors. It involves various rituals, including cleaning graves, lighting lanterns, and participating in folk dances known as bon odori. The festival is seen as a time of reunion between the living and the dead.
3. New Orleans Jazz Funerals - In New Orleans, Louisiana, jazz funerals are a tradition that combines mourning with joyful music and celebration. The procession begins with somber dirges and transitions into upbeat jazz music as mourners accompany the deceased to the burial site. The lively music is believed to help uplift the spirits of both the living and the dead.
4. Irish Wake - In Ireland, a wake is a gathering held after someone has died, typically at their home. It involves sharing stories, singing songs, and raising a glass in honor of the deceased. The atmosphere is often one of warmth and camaraderie, emphasizing the celebration of the person's life rather than focusing solely on grief.
5. Holi Festival - Celebrated in India and Nepal, Holi is a spring festival known as the "Festival of Colors." It involves throwing vibrant colored powders and water at one another in a spirit of joy and playfulness. While not explicitly related to loss, Holi represents the renewal of life and the triumph of good over evil, offering a sense of hope and positivity.
These examples illustrate how different cultures approach loss and separation with rituals that emphasize connection, remembrance, and the continuation of life in various forms.
These concepts are closely linked to the topic of loss and letting go, as they involve navigating the emotional terrain of detachment and connection. When faced with loss, individuals often experience a sense of separation from the person or thing they have lost. This can be accompanied by feelings of grief, sadness, and longing as they adjust to the absence of what was once familiar and significant.
At the same time, the process of differentiation becomes crucial in coping with loss. It enables individuals to maintain a sense of self amidst the pain of separation, allowing them to acknowledge their feelings while also preserving their own identity and autonomy. By fostering a healthy sense of differentiation, individuals can navigate the grieving process more effectively and ultimately find a path toward acceptance and healing.
There are cultures that perceive loss as a celebration or view it through a more positive lens. In some societies, rituals surrounding separation and loss are designed to facilitate healing, closure, and even transformation. Here are a few examples of such rituals from different cultures:
1. Dia de los Muertos (Day of the Dead) - Celebrated primarily in Mexico, this holiday honors deceased loved ones by creating altars with their photos, favorite foods, and other offerings. Families gather to remember and celebrate the lives of the departed through music, dance, and storytelling.
2. Bon Festival - Observed in Japan, the Bon Festival is a Buddhist tradition where families honor the spirits of their ancestors. It involves various rituals, including cleaning graves, lighting lanterns, and participating in folk dances known as bon odori. The festival is seen as a time of reunion between the living and the dead.
3. New Orleans Jazz Funerals - In New Orleans, Louisiana, jazz funerals are a tradition that combines mourning with joyful music and celebration. The procession begins with somber dirges and transitions into upbeat jazz music as mourners accompany the deceased to the burial site. The lively music is believed to help uplift the spirits of both the living and the dead.
4. Irish Wake - In Ireland, a wake is a gathering held after someone has died, typically at their home. It involves sharing stories, singing songs, and raising a glass in honor of the deceased. The atmosphere is often one of warmth and camaraderie, emphasizing the celebration of the person's life rather than focusing solely on grief.
5. Holi Festival - Celebrated in India and Nepal, Holi is a spring festival known as the "Festival of Colors." It involves throwing vibrant colored powders and water at one another in a spirit of joy and playfulness. While not explicitly related to loss, Holi represents the renewal of life and the triumph of good over evil, offering a sense of hope and positivity.
These examples illustrate how different cultures approach loss and separation with rituals that emphasize connection, remembrance, and the continuation of life in various forms.
inspirations
Explore step-by-step scripts for rituals from Africa, South America, and Eastern Europe that perceive loss as a celebration or view it through a more positive lens:
I. Celebration of Life Ritual (Yoruba Tradition, Nigeria):
Step 1: Preparation
- Gather family members, friends, and community members in a communal space, such as a village square or family compound.
- Arrange for traditional African music, drummers, and dancers to create a festive atmosphere.
- Decorate the space with vibrant colors, flowers, and symbolic objects representing life and vitality.
Step 2: Sharing Memories
- Begin the ritual by inviting participants to share fond memories, stories, and anecdotes about the deceased.
- Encourage everyone to express gratitude for the positive impact the deceased had on their lives and the community.
- Use storytelling as a way to honor the legacy and achievements of the departed individual.
Step 3: Music and Dance
- Transition into a lively celebration with traditional African music and dance performances.
- Invite participants to join in the dancing and singing as a way to release pent-up emotions and celebrate the life of the departed.
- Encourage joyful expressions of movement and rhythm as a form of catharsis and healing.
Step 4: Communal Feast
- Conclude the ritual with a communal feast featuring traditional African dishes and delicacies.
- Share food and drink as a symbol of unity, solidarity, and abundance.
- Use the act of eating together to reinforce bonds of kinship and support among participants.
II. Day of the Dead (Día de los Muertos) Celebration (Mexico):
Step 1: Preparation
- Set up an altar (ofrenda) in a prominent place in the home or community space.
- Decorate the altar with colorful papel picado (cut paper), marigold flowers (cempasúchil), candles, and photographs of deceased loved ones.
- Place offerings of their favorite foods, drinks, and belongings on the altar to honor and remember them.
Step 2: Welcome of the Spirits
- Begin the celebration on October 31st by inviting the spirits of the departed to return to the earthly realm.
- Light candles and incense to guide the spirits back home and create a welcoming atmosphere.
- Play traditional music and perform dances to accompany the spirits on their journey.
Step 3: Celebration and Remembrance
- On November 1st and 2nd, celebrate the lives of the departed with feasting, music, and storytelling.
- Share stories and memories of the deceased, keeping their memory alive through storytelling and laughter.
- Offer prayers and blessings for their journey in the afterlife, believing that they are still present in spirit.
Step 4: Visiting the Cemetery
- Visit the gravesites of deceased loved ones to clean and decorate them with flowers, candles, and offerings.
- Hold vigils and prayers at the gravesites, honoring the memory of the departed and seeking their continued guidance and protection.
- Share food and drink with other families at the cemetery, fostering a sense of community and solidarity in grief.
Step 5: Closing and Farewell
- Conclude the celebration with a final prayer or blessing, expressing gratitude for the time spent with the spirits of the departed.
- Bid farewell to the spirits, knowing that they will return again next year for another joyful reunion.
- Carry the spirit of the celebration with you throughout the year, honoring the memory of the departed in your daily life.
One ritual from Eastern Europe that perceives loss as a celebration or views it through a more positive lens is:
III. Slavic Kupala Night Celebration (Slavic Countries):
Step 1: Preparation
- Gather in a natural outdoor setting, such as a forest clearing or near a body of water, on the evening of July 6th, the eve of the feast of John the Baptist.
- Decorate the space with flowers, herbs, and wreaths, symbolizing the bounty of nature and the cycle of life.
- Build a bonfire in the center of the gathering area, using wood, straw, and other natural materials.
Step 2: Ritual Purification
- Begin the celebration with a ritual bath or cleansing ceremony in the nearby river, lake, or stream.
- Participants immerse themselves in the water, symbolically washing away their sorrows, regrets, and negative emotions.
- Offer prayers and blessings to the water spirits, asking for purification, healing, and renewal.
Step 3: Lighting of the Bonfire
- As dusk falls, gather around the bonfire and light it with a ceremonial torch or flame.
- Dance and sing around the fire, invoking the blessings of the sun and the fire spirits for fertility, abundance, and protection.
- Toss offerings of herbs, flowers, and other symbolic items into the fire, symbolizing the release of past grievances and the embrace of new beginnings.
Step 4: Ritual Feast and Celebration
- Share a communal feast of traditional foods and drinks, such as bread, cheese, honey, and mead, symbolizing the bounty of the harvest and the blessings of nature.
- Engage in games, dances, and rituals that celebrate the joy of life and the unity of the community.
- Offer prayers and blessings for fertility, prosperity, and happiness in the coming year.
Step 5: Ritual of Love and Connection
- Participate in rituals of courtship and love, such as the weaving of flower wreaths and the exchange of tokens of affection.
- Couples jump over the bonfire hand in hand, symbolizing their commitment to each other and their desire for a bright and joyful future.
- Share stories, songs, and poems that celebrate love, passion, and the beauty of the natural world.
Step 6: Closing Blessing
- Conclude the celebration with a final blessing and prayer, expressing gratitude for the opportunity to come together in community and celebration.
- Offer thanks to the earth, the sun, and the elements for their blessings and protection.
- Carry the spirit of the celebration with you throughout the year, embracing the joy of life and the beauty of nature in all its forms.
This ritual demonstrates how loss can be perceived as a celebration or viewed through a more positive lens, emphasizing purification, renewal, and connection with nature and community.
I. Celebration of Life Ritual (Yoruba Tradition, Nigeria):
Step 1: Preparation
- Gather family members, friends, and community members in a communal space, such as a village square or family compound.
- Arrange for traditional African music, drummers, and dancers to create a festive atmosphere.
- Decorate the space with vibrant colors, flowers, and symbolic objects representing life and vitality.
Step 2: Sharing Memories
- Begin the ritual by inviting participants to share fond memories, stories, and anecdotes about the deceased.
- Encourage everyone to express gratitude for the positive impact the deceased had on their lives and the community.
- Use storytelling as a way to honor the legacy and achievements of the departed individual.
Step 3: Music and Dance
- Transition into a lively celebration with traditional African music and dance performances.
- Invite participants to join in the dancing and singing as a way to release pent-up emotions and celebrate the life of the departed.
- Encourage joyful expressions of movement and rhythm as a form of catharsis and healing.
Step 4: Communal Feast
- Conclude the ritual with a communal feast featuring traditional African dishes and delicacies.
- Share food and drink as a symbol of unity, solidarity, and abundance.
- Use the act of eating together to reinforce bonds of kinship and support among participants.
II. Day of the Dead (Día de los Muertos) Celebration (Mexico):
Step 1: Preparation
- Set up an altar (ofrenda) in a prominent place in the home or community space.
- Decorate the altar with colorful papel picado (cut paper), marigold flowers (cempasúchil), candles, and photographs of deceased loved ones.
- Place offerings of their favorite foods, drinks, and belongings on the altar to honor and remember them.
Step 2: Welcome of the Spirits
- Begin the celebration on October 31st by inviting the spirits of the departed to return to the earthly realm.
- Light candles and incense to guide the spirits back home and create a welcoming atmosphere.
- Play traditional music and perform dances to accompany the spirits on their journey.
Step 3: Celebration and Remembrance
- On November 1st and 2nd, celebrate the lives of the departed with feasting, music, and storytelling.
- Share stories and memories of the deceased, keeping their memory alive through storytelling and laughter.
- Offer prayers and blessings for their journey in the afterlife, believing that they are still present in spirit.
Step 4: Visiting the Cemetery
- Visit the gravesites of deceased loved ones to clean and decorate them with flowers, candles, and offerings.
- Hold vigils and prayers at the gravesites, honoring the memory of the departed and seeking their continued guidance and protection.
- Share food and drink with other families at the cemetery, fostering a sense of community and solidarity in grief.
Step 5: Closing and Farewell
- Conclude the celebration with a final prayer or blessing, expressing gratitude for the time spent with the spirits of the departed.
- Bid farewell to the spirits, knowing that they will return again next year for another joyful reunion.
- Carry the spirit of the celebration with you throughout the year, honoring the memory of the departed in your daily life.
One ritual from Eastern Europe that perceives loss as a celebration or views it through a more positive lens is:
III. Slavic Kupala Night Celebration (Slavic Countries):
Step 1: Preparation
- Gather in a natural outdoor setting, such as a forest clearing or near a body of water, on the evening of July 6th, the eve of the feast of John the Baptist.
- Decorate the space with flowers, herbs, and wreaths, symbolizing the bounty of nature and the cycle of life.
- Build a bonfire in the center of the gathering area, using wood, straw, and other natural materials.
Step 2: Ritual Purification
- Begin the celebration with a ritual bath or cleansing ceremony in the nearby river, lake, or stream.
- Participants immerse themselves in the water, symbolically washing away their sorrows, regrets, and negative emotions.
- Offer prayers and blessings to the water spirits, asking for purification, healing, and renewal.
Step 3: Lighting of the Bonfire
- As dusk falls, gather around the bonfire and light it with a ceremonial torch or flame.
- Dance and sing around the fire, invoking the blessings of the sun and the fire spirits for fertility, abundance, and protection.
- Toss offerings of herbs, flowers, and other symbolic items into the fire, symbolizing the release of past grievances and the embrace of new beginnings.
Step 4: Ritual Feast and Celebration
- Share a communal feast of traditional foods and drinks, such as bread, cheese, honey, and mead, symbolizing the bounty of the harvest and the blessings of nature.
- Engage in games, dances, and rituals that celebrate the joy of life and the unity of the community.
- Offer prayers and blessings for fertility, prosperity, and happiness in the coming year.
Step 5: Ritual of Love and Connection
- Participate in rituals of courtship and love, such as the weaving of flower wreaths and the exchange of tokens of affection.
- Couples jump over the bonfire hand in hand, symbolizing their commitment to each other and their desire for a bright and joyful future.
- Share stories, songs, and poems that celebrate love, passion, and the beauty of the natural world.
Step 6: Closing Blessing
- Conclude the celebration with a final blessing and prayer, expressing gratitude for the opportunity to come together in community and celebration.
- Offer thanks to the earth, the sun, and the elements for their blessings and protection.
- Carry the spirit of the celebration with you throughout the year, embracing the joy of life and the beauty of nature in all its forms.
This ritual demonstrates how loss can be perceived as a celebration or viewed through a more positive lens, emphasizing purification, renewal, and connection with nature and community.
creative exercise
Welcome to this creative writing exercise centered around the theme of "letting go." Drawing inspiration from various cultural rituals and practices that celebrate breakup, separation, or loss, it's now your turn to craft your own personalized "Let it Go" ritual. Instead of dwelling in sorrow, we'll approach this ritual with a lens of joy and positivity, embracing the opportunity for renewal and growth.
Your task is to create two distinct scripts: one designed to be carried out alone, and another intended for a communal gathering.
Dive deep into the details, envisioning the setting, time, lighting, and any accessories or symbolic elements that will enhance the experience. Consider incorporating music, dance, spoken word, or other performative elements to bring your concept to life. May this exercise inspire you to embrace the act of letting go with a sense of liberation and empowerment. Good luck!
Your task is to create two distinct scripts: one designed to be carried out alone, and another intended for a communal gathering.
Dive deep into the details, envisioning the setting, time, lighting, and any accessories or symbolic elements that will enhance the experience. Consider incorporating music, dance, spoken word, or other performative elements to bring your concept to life. May this exercise inspire you to embrace the act of letting go with a sense of liberation and empowerment. Good luck!
stay motivated!
As we conclude this creative writing journey on the theme of "letting go," let us take a moment to embrace the wisdom of zen philosophy. In the practice of letting go, we find liberation from the burdens of attachment and the constraints of the past. Just as a tree releases its leaves in the autumn breeze, we too can surrender what no longer serves us, allowing space for new growth and transformation. Letting go is not an act of weakness, but rather a courageous step towards freedom and inner peace. As you navigate the ebb and flow of life's transitions, may you find solace in the gentle reminder that in releasing the old, we make room for the beautiful possibilities of the present moment. Embrace the journey, trust in the process, and let your heart be light as you continue along your path.
Photo: UNIAN / Slavic Kupala Night